So, you’ve had an exhausting day on the hill. From stomping that rad backy to getting cut off in the lift line to skinning up the back bowl… you’ve put in WERK! Naturally, after a long day on the planks, you’re headed to the base lodge bar. If you’re a local the bartender will slide you your usual, if you’re vacationing you ask for something strong, and if you’re the 18-year-old park rat you’re not at the bar but you’re still enjoying a Natty Light in the bed of your truck.
With such a variety of slope monkeys and a plethora of drink options, what does your aprés ski beverage choice say about you?
1. Pabst Blue Ribbon
You’re definitely a local. There’s something about an ice-cold PBR that just screams ski bum. No frills, only function. If you’re pulling back the tab on a PBR it’s likely that you have messy hair, a scruffy beard, and are probably wearing a flannel. Don’t tell the others that the bartender gave you the local price.
2. A shot (or a few) of Fireball
You’re a 20-something-year-old reliving the glory days with your friends from college, and you’ve definitely been abusing the shot ski. That last shot of Fireball probably gave you the final push of confidence you needed to talk to the local chick sitting next to you. I’m telling you now, don’t do it, she’s not interested. And whatever you do, don’t brag to her about how much of an expert you are because I guarantee that she can shred harder.
3. A Hot Toddy
You’re probably my mom. Whether it’s made with whiskey, rum, or brandy, this drink gets those middle-aged women on their feet when the live band starts playing a Peter Frampton cover. This cozy drink is every bit boozy but it’s masked as a tea so you better watch out, or you’ll inadvertently end up as the band’s back-up dancer.
4. Scotch
You decided to take a family trip to the slopes, and after spending half the day dressing your three kids and then undressing them because they had to pee and then dressing them again, you need something to send you into full relaxation mode. You have just enough time to enjoy a finger or two of Scotch and munch on a basket of nachos with your fam squad before it’s time to walk the half a mile to the car and load up all five pairs of skis.
5. Natty Light
You’re 18 years old, ski solely in the park, and let’s face it, your fake isn’t going to pass at the lodge bar. So, you uncover that six-pack of Natty Light that you stashed in the snowbank behind your truck and crush a couple of cans with your buddies. As you guys exchange the day’s wildest tricks and gnarliest wipeouts, everyone’s stories are bound to get embellished after a beer or two.