The Top 5 Worst Ski Movies of All Time

It is summer and all of us at SnowBrains are counting down the days until we can ski and board again. Some of us (looking at you, Miles) are lucky to be skiing in the Southern Hemisphere but most of us will just day dream of better (read: whiter) days.

With at least three months to go until the ski season starts again in most of America, we can stretch the wait out by watching some ski movies. While there are some great ski movies to watch, there are also some total duds. We have listed the five worst ski movies you will want to avoid—or maybe watch extremely drunk while throwing things at the screen (think ‘The Room’ but with snow), although you are probably better off watching some corny 90s movies for that purpose. At least they have some redeeming values, unlike this terrible top 5 of worst ski movies.

#5 Downhill

Like many Hollywood movies, this one is a remake of a foreign film. Unlike the successful Swedish original ‘Force Majeur,’ however, the remake became a flop. It falls painfully short of the dark, subtle humor of the Swedish original and instead relies on painful slapstick and American stereotypes about Europeans. Australian Miranda Otto cast as the Austrian hotel owner is most undignified (maybe someone needed to explain to the directors that Australia and Austria are not the same) and even the great scenery in St. Anton cannot safe the movie. “We would all be much better off if the remake never happened and, as always, Julia Louis-Dreyfus deserves so much better,” criticized Dave Giannini from In Session Film.

#4 Ice Breaker

Think ‘Die Hard’ set in Killington, Vermont, except it’s bad. Who doesn’t love Sean Astin in the Goonies, Stranger Things, or Lord of the Rings. But there is a reason he is the eternal sidekick: he cannot carry this low-budget movie that has more plotholes than ski scenes. It’s a low budget movie that is trying hard to be something bigger and better but is unsure what and flipflops between corny, slapstick, and action in a hapless matter that cannot be saved by Bruce Campbell’s great acting. Unlike the corny 90s movies, it just fails to entertain and leaves viewers hanging, wanting more.

#3 Avalanche Sharks

Do I need to say more than that this was made as a sequel to the Sharknado series? Okay, let’s say more: a supernatural shark is awoken by an avalanche and proceeds to consume bikini-clad college girls. The plot is crazy, the acting is horrible, the CGI is abysmal, and it is offensive to Native Americans, women, skiers/boarders, and possibly sharks. This is one of those movies where you wonder how the heck it got funding.

#2 Copper Mountain

It may have been aiming to be a promo for Copper Mountain’s Club Med at the time, but this has got to be the worst investment the resort ever made—and it can’t have been a big one. The filming, editing, direction, sound, lighting, and music is terrible. The plot is non-existent. Jim Carrey is just painful. The best part is that it’s short, 60 minutes, but that still seems too long. It lacks the charm of other 80s ski movies and just feels contrived.

#1 Frozen

So, the plot is simple and slightly intriguing: a group of three friends get stranded on a chairlift and are faced with the prospect of being stranded there for the next five days as the resort only operates on weekends. It’s a question we have probably all gone through in our heads on a chairlift: “What if?”— and that’s how we all get sucked in who have watched this. Unfortunately, the movie leaves you screaming at the TV in frustration and wishing they had all just stayed put, dying slowly over several days instead of pursuing idiotic or unlogical options. The movie is just plain stupid and unparalleled in the frustration it evokes in any skier, snowboarder, or anyone with half a brain.