Real Talk: What It’s Really Like Skiing in Patagonia… (Like Skiing Up a Cloud’s Bu**hole!)

Miles Clark | | Post Tag for Conditions ReportConditions Report

Report from August 21, 2022 in Bariloche, Argentina

“It’s like skiing up a cloud’s Butthole!” – Greggy, 8/21/22

OK.

We know that we’ve been doing our best to make the skiing look good down here:

To be honest, these benevolent features are relatively rare down here.

The videos above & below more accurately describe what it’s like to ski and ride down here.

Fog so thick you can’t see the chair in front of you…

So thick you could literally reach out your hand and grab it and end up with a wet hand.

This is the only place I’ve ever skied where the visibility was so bad that I simply fell over.

I just didn’t know which way was up.

Can’t even see the chair in front of you…  Riding up the chairlift on August 21, 2022. image: snowbrains

I’ve been with people who have gotten nauseous, who have gotten vertigo from the dense, disorienting fog here.

More often than not it seems Patagonia holds wet, windy, foggy, low visibility weather.

The wind is so strong here that it frequently closes the mountain for days at a time.

These diabolical gales smash, rip, compress, and tear the snow up so bad it ends up skiing like broken concrete.

Carton (cardboard) is the term they have for it here and it’s nearly constant in the alpine.

It rains quite a bit, too, especially at the base…

Upper mountain vistas. image: snowbrains

After a week-long powder storm, the sun enjoys coming out and panfrying the perfect snow by 10am..

The weather is simply brutal here.

Brutal…

But when the sun does come out gently, when the snow conditions do line up, when the wind takes a brief hiatus, there’s simply no place I’d rather be.

Can just see something up ahead… image: snowbrains

The yin and yang.

There’s no good without evil.

No light without dark.

No bluebird powder days without vicious winds, viscous fog, and vindictive snow.

Thank you for all you are and for all you do, Patagonia.

Never stop being you.

Taking in the upper mountain views. image: snowbrains

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